Are you quietly fumbling in the dark with your sex life? Although raw sex is a physical act, the sensual experience of making love together can be greatly enhanced by engaging all your senses. Every one of your five senses contributes to your mood to some degree. By setting the scene for your romantic or sexy encounter you can create an atmosphere for loving, sensual pleasure. Relaxing or exciting, sights, sounds and scents have the power to stimulate your most potent sex organ – your mind. So, come out of the dark and experience sex in a whole new light.
When watching a movie together, consider how the lighting and sound sets the tone for the action. From sultry and steamy to pulse pounding intensity, combinations of lighting and sound can create a totally magical experience. You don’t need a big budget to produce erotically charged sex scenes. With a few ideas and a little imagination, you can easily make your lover feel like a star in your very own sex play. Rather than hiding yourselves quietly in the dark, discover each other and creatively direct sensational sex scenes together.
As mentioned, lighting affects our moods and therefore our ultimate enjoyment of sex. The type, color, intensity and design of the light source can excite or relax with many erotic variations in between. Both men and women are visual creatures and are aroused by sexy sights. In the right light, seeing each other in the throes of passion may be your best form of visual stimulation. Here are some mood lighting ideas:
- Candles: The flickering light of even a single candle can add an enchanting mystique to any room. Candles create a soft radiance that gives your bodies a warm glow. Subdued lighting also makes the surrounding décor feel cozy and private. Stained glass candle holders can enhance the effect even more. Try one, a few and, every now and then, go wild with dozens of candles.
- Fireplace: Making love in front of a blazing fire or the smoldering red embers afterwards can be a delightful, romantic experience. Even without a real one, you can recreate the sensual effect with a fireplace video and a portable heater.
- Moon & Starlight: Although best far from city lights, making love outside in the star or moon light can be an erotic adventure. Plan a special outing to coincide with a full moon.
- Sunset/Sunrise: A classic for romance, sensual intimacy during a sunrise or sunset can make them even more special. Make love outside or in a car while enjoying the reddish hues of the sky.
- Strobe light: Imagine having wild sex in a pitch black room streaked with flashes of each other erotically frozen in your mind. The intensity of the flickering, stop motion style visual stimulation can be extremely thrilling. Bright colored lingerie adds to the effect.
- Flashlight: Use a small pen light to shine on areas of your body that you want stimulated. Turn it into a foreplay game. Start with a feather or artist brush, then touching, licking and sucking. Have your lover shine the flashlight on an erogenous zone that desires your focused attention.
- Rope & String Lights: Use decorative LED lights to add a special touch or fancy design for special occasions. Create a heart shape on the ceiling, border a mirror, showcase a collection of sex toys or design a futuristic role playing environment.
Try out different colored bulbs in regular light sockets (orange, green, blue, purple, black, flickering, etc.). A shade or dimmer switch is important too. Various colors and intensities will make your bodies appear different. Also try lava lamps, fiber optic lights, spot lights, glow in the dark items, etc. Some lights can even be controlled with music to pulse with different colors and intensities. Experiment with various types of lighting to enhance your mood and sexual enjoyment. Use your creativity to explore the full erotic potential of mood light. There are so many wonderful possibilities to play with.
Many people forget the importance of sound and the affect is has on us. Music, for instance, can almost instantly trigger a change in mood. Relaxing or exciting, music has been made to stimulate every type of emotion. And, a sexy voice can be very erotic. Words and sounds can convey sensuality and lust. They can arouse desire and stimulate mental images or fantasies. For some people, sexy sounds are better than explicit visuals. Here are some ideas for aural stimulation:
- Talk Dirty: A sensual voice can arouse fantasies with descriptive suggestions. Explore erotic words or romantic euphemisms from books or movies. If you are a little shy, practice with your lover over the phone while you are away from each other. Erotic stories read out loud and whispered descriptions of your desire are good aural treats.
- Sounds of Passion: Both men and women enjoy lovers who make noise as an expression of their passion. “Oohs” and “Aahs” combined with some “dirty words” of encouragement add to the mental thrill. Demonstrate your enthusiasm for each other with sounds of pleasure. Recorded sounds of passion or even background erotic movies can also be arousing.
- Exotic Sounds: Use CDs with recorded sounds of nature (waves, rain, thunder, a gushing river, blowing wind, etc.) to transport yourselves to a pretend fantasy location. Depending on the type of fantasy or roleplaying game, special sound tracks could enhance the setting.
- Mood Music: Depending upon the type of mood you desire, try instrumental music to guide the rhythm and pace of your love making. Calming peaceful music will encourage slow and sensual touching, kissing and licking. Music with a heavy, pulsing beat will encourage intensely passionate sex. Try to find music that builds intensity smoothly to help guide your bodies to an ultimate climax.
- Erotic Dance: Dancing together or for your lover can be very romantic and erotic. Seductive and sultry music is great for enticingly slow movements. Faster paced, sexy rock/pop music is excellent for stimulating desire for wild, passionate sex. Slow dancing naked together is a very intimate, romantic and sensual activity that can be done as foreplay or after play.
- Oral Sex: When stimulating various erogenous zones, play some instrumental music that starts soft and slowly builds intensity. Use the rhythm of the music to guide your loving attention. Consider creating your own sound track with multiple songs that are relaxing yet arousing.
- Sensory Shift: Try having your lover wear a blindfold and headphones. Without being able to see or hear you, their sense of touch will heighten. Build erotic excitement with unexpected, creative sensations. The anticipation of each touch will make their entire body tingle.
Try different sources and types of sound to help explore your aural erogenous zones. Experiment in the fine art of erotic talk and, with practice, you will become comfortable offering your own aural stimulation. There are books and programs available to help refine your aural skills. Expressing yourselves in this way may also encourage you to have more intimate discussions and improve other aspects of your relationship.